In living color

This week started with a wonderful experience that supported my desire to be a teacher and a more authentic person. When I first walked into the building early Tuesday morning I really didn't know what to expect. I had not been in class for five days and I was wondering if I would be able to catch up after being gone so long. As I walked through the hall one of my students noticed me and immediately greeted me with, "Mr. Avery, where have you been?" I could not help but grin as I said, "Good morning." This was followed by a brief discussion about how my schedule had changed and what happened while I was gone. When I walked into my first period classroom I found that several of my students had arrived early and were sitting at a table talking. When they noticed me entering the room they all greeted me with loud,"Good mornings!" and "Where have you been?", "Why weren't you here?" "We missed you!" I felt that if the day stopped right then it would be complete. I was so amazed and humbled by how genuine their interest was and how I had become part of their classroom experience. We talked for a few minutes to catch up and then they returned to their conversations and I got down to some housekeeping,but as students continued to trickle in before the bell they would greet me and let me know that I had been missed. This continued to happen during the day as I moved through my classes and I never stopped being overwhelmed by their interest.
What do I take away from this? A couple of things. First, one can rarely know the influence they have on others. Before this encounter I had spent every day wondering,"Have I done something that connects with my students?" Often I thought that I am just a small presence in the back of the room who occasionally makes some comment or passes out papers,but is not really part of their reality. This showed me that even the small things that I had done, greeting them at the door,answering their questions in class, noticing them in the hall even when they wanted to be "invisible" really did matter. It was an opportunity,one that rarely occurs as we go about our busy days, to see that we can matter to others. From this I was able to see in "living color" what Neito, Deiro,And Cushman all write about; students are aware of our presence and the person/teacher that we want to be is the one that we need to show them at all times. This is not to say that we should be to be "acting". In fact I believe that if I tried to be unauthentic before my students they would easily recognize this and treat me accordingly. It is being ourselves and striving towards being that teacher who we conceptualize as the ideal,knowing that we will never be that perfect. It is being made aware that along the journey towards that ideal, we are recognized for trying and encouraged to go on. This is what my students did for me. I hope that I can do it for them.